Negrophile - Ahhhh the American Lexicon Never Ceases to Amaze

Taking a look at norms in the Dictionary of 1959 in America:

It all started on sunny day in September. I was Running to the basement to see the maintenance man who was down there snaking a drain, I stopped dead in my tracks. I looked over and two guys were twisting a snake with a drill into a pipe that went somewhere in the house, they said there was a clog. What was that smell? Books, water, records, mold, mmmhmmmmm yep, a 100+ yr old basement. Something so amazing about that smell, it's so familiar like a dogs paws, or their breath. If only I could bottle up dog feet smells and 100 year old dusty, rusty basements...

So I look down, with Frick and Frack busy, and I see three books, damp, starting to mold, and I grabbed them immediately. I run to my apartment close the door, back in a safe place to see my findings I looked them over one by one. One; A Merriam Webster Dictionary from 1959, Two: a travel book by Zig Zag, written at the turn of the century, it had a dark blue hardback cover and matte pages that smelled old. The final and third book was called '100 things die hard Broncos fans should know before they die'. 

Woah, all great finds, but I am a complete sucker for books, the nostalgia, the smell of the pages, the choice of finish on the pages, and the thinness of the paper were all parts of my analysis of books, especially because I use them in all kinds of art. I love using pages of old college textbooks, things I find in books online I print and use in art, and I love putting mod podge on different papers and making hanging lights, paper ornaments, backing of pictures, and much more. Give me an old book and some glue or mod podge and I am in heaven and will create things until the supplies are gone. 

I begin flipping through this dictionary. I think, hmmmm lets look up "Ni**er", so I flip to the N's and begin my search, right above the word I was searching for, I was dumbfounded to find the word "niggardly" it was defined as n. "in the manner of a niggard", "Stingy, scanty" etc... I was stunned, I cannot believe this shiiiiit was in the dictionary in 1959. Why would you ever call someone this when for hundreds of years you gave them the food that was thrown away, after the dogs ate, you denied them of basic human rights and have the audacity to not just say it, but define it in the American Lexiconic Bible for proper and improper English as of 1959?

 So moving on shaking my head in disgust and dismay, I find the word "Ni**er" n. and it is defined as "(substandard term) often used familiarly, now chiefly contemptuously , loosley any member of a dark skinned race". Uhhhh familiarly to whom? This is before any rise of hip hop or even the crack epidemic so who in the Fu*k is saying this familarily? 

 Ok, Ok, I cannot wait to see what Negro is defined as, I flip to the page, waiiit what??? Under the word Negro, is the word Negrophile. Negrophile: Verb, defined as "One friendly to the Negro" 

What in the holy fuck? I finally found the word to describe me, I have been searching my whole life for a label that describes my self-proclaimed love of the black culture in America. My whole hearted fascination and fight for human equality started long ago maybe before I was born. I have and still like being around people who are considered outsiders and making them feel welcomed, and part of the fold, the community, the event. I have always been that way with all people the mainstream shuns. I never got it, and still don't, but I too have always felt displaced, never at home with white people never at home with African-Americans (shrug).

At the end of the day people are people, and if they have a small conscience, zero confidence and care what others think they will also act in the same ways black or white, yellow or blue. So I guess I understand that feeling of never fitting in, and frankly I am glad for it now. I cannot stand the mainstream or the status quo, here as always we infiltrate the status quo. That's right people when the status quo police come we say, "sorry, we don't adhere to those practices" and gently shut the door in their faces. 

So upon finding this word 'negrophile' I felt so stunned, and for some reason I got a little uhhhmmmm, I have to say I got a little twinge in my well, UUHhhhummm panties, and wanted to try this word out in my raceplay. I want to be clear, calling men demeaning names does not turn me on, it was finding something so gross, that put a new spin on the N word, it was the reaction a smart, educated black man would possibly respond to such scheit, and a white woman nonetheless saying it. You know the elephant in the room, and now we are ignoring it and making it normalized or are we? Acknowledgment goes a long way with the human conscience. 

I had the perfect person in mind, one of my longest customers. I had a facetime call with him, we talked music, life etc. I could tell he was itching for r@cepl@ay, I said "guess what, I finally found a way to describe myself, that maybe less taboo". He said "oh ya"? "Tell me"? 

"Negro Phile" I got my teeth and mouth close to the camera and slowly said it again, "N E G R O P H I L E". I let the silence cleanse the air of my mouth gestures and let the word sit in the space between us. I was looking at the phone, he was sitting in a chair, and I could tell he was very aroused. 

He laid his head back casually, and said "Yes, Yes you are a Negrophile". I started r@cepl@y and used this word over and over and then started using the N word, and well let's say, it seemed to be a smashing hit, and a new tool in my raceplay toolbelt. 

So there you have it folks, you never know how running into a dusty crusty old basement will show you new ways to excite men in the r@cepl@y arena and take your r@cepl@y to new heights.  But that is the kind of content creator I am. I am always searching in the strangest places for things that either give me new ways to see something, or they further propagate old "norms" or generalizations that in my opinion are outdated and need to go and be called out, like Negrophile. But nonetheless, humanity never ceases to amaze me in the ridiculous ways we treat each other or think its proper in a dictionary to describe human beings. Now that Merriam Webster has defined me I can run around calling myself that, maybe even naked.  Or maybe it made me grateful I was not alive during this time, because I would have been shunned even more than now for being friendly to Negros. 

God for fucking bid, I be friendly to displaced humans trying hundreds of years after enslavement trying to find their place in the world. God for Fucking bid we do something to sooth humans instead of creating further desecration and hate towards a people for no reason except the color of their skin who never asked to be here in the first place. God for fucking bid, we think how that would feel, have some empathy and move the fuck on already. But folks that is not what humans do. We love to keep making the same mistakes for generations and then in our "ehhhem" democratic process we vote in Obama or my favorite the orange hair man who makes less sense than toddlers in daycare, they back right and left like that means something, and nothing happens.  What really matters now, in my opinion,  is that now, that we have omitted Negro, Negrophile, Ni**er, and Niggardly from the dictionary of today, and do black americans feel overall more equal, supported, and part of the American fabric and culture than in 1959? I am not sure, since I am not black I don't want to speak for anyone, but I think some things have gotten better, we had Obama as a president, and well, Oprah, I mean that is enough to lean on that all black people feel totally comfortable anyplace they go in America and those norms are now obliterated, right (I say in jest). Well, for some people maybe, but we still have sundowner towns in the south, we still have remnants all over America of the atrocities of slavery.  And now ladies and gentlemen we have r@cepl@y the most taboo fetish since mommy/son (jest again). At the end of the day words matter, humans matter, but it has to start within us as individuals. Calling out this bull is a start, acknowledging the black experience and giving credit where credit is due is a start. Telling history from all sides is a start. 

So what are you going to do with Negrophile, use it, or throw it to the side or get some rocks off when I say in r@cepl@y? Whatever you decide just know I am proud to be a Negrophile, it doesn't bother me one tiny bit. The only people is seems to bother or miff, is those with "cough, cough" small dick energy or just small dicks and small minds. 

As always I am pushing the boundaries of R@cepl@y and hope to see you back here for my next article. Time for you to chime in let me know what you think!